Bitchin' Mac and Cheese

So this recipe stemmed from a number of circumstances. Our old cheese grater was literally falling apart. We'd had it less than a year, and I decided that this time I was going to buy an expensive one because it would work better and last longer and in the end cost less because it would still be in one piece in a year instead of five pieces in six months. So yesterday I went to the mall and bought the nicest cheese grater I could find in Williams Sonomoa. It cost about $16, it's made by microplane, it cuts in both directions, it's beautiful. So I decided to make macaroni and cheese. But no ordinary mac and cheese was worthy of the inaugural grating, so this... this mac and cheese had to be bitchin'. I unfortunately got up too late to go to the store this morning, so I made do with what I had on hand. Luckily that was a bunch of stuff. Here's my recipe.

Ingredients (sorry, the proportions are not well defined):

• Box of pasta (I had mezze penne, but you can use anything macaroni-like)
• 4 tbsp butter (ish)
• Flour (um... a couple spoonfuls?)
• 1/2 c cream
• Milk (3/4 cup maybe?)
• 8 oz block Vermont Cheddar
• 1/3 cup shredded Parmesan (maybe)
• 4 oz? Gruyere
• Paprika
• Nutmeg
• Salt and pepper to taste
• 4+ (I used like 8) cloves of garlic
• Medium onion
• Can of artichoke hearts (in water)
• Can of black olives (normal size)
• 4 large spoonfuls of green olives
• 2 heaping tsp of Dijon mustard

Directions:

(It was not this orderly when I did it)

1. Prepare: Grate your cheeses and set them aside. Peel and mince the garlic. Peel and finely dice the onion. Drain the can of artichoke hearts and the can of black olives. Chop the artichoke hearts. If you have a food processor, dump the olives (green and black both) in with the Dijon mustard and run until evenly chopped (not pureed!) If you don't have a food processor, do some more chopping and mix the olive bits with the Dijon
2. Fry: Throw the garlic and onion in a frying pan with some olive oil. Cook until the onion starts to become translucent and the garlic starts to brown a bit. Then throw the artichokes in and stir.
3. Pasta: Put a large pot of water on to boil. Start the cheese sauce in the meantime. When it boils, dump in the box of pasta and cook to desired doneness (do this by tasting, not by timing, overdone pasta is a travesty) and drain.
4. Cheese sauce: Take the frying pan off the heat. Put a saucepan on low heat with the butter in it. When the butter is melted, spoon in the flour and stir vigorously. You want a thick roux. Then throw in the cream, some more flour, and some milk. Stir a lot. Gradually add the cheeses. Season with nutmeg, paprika, salt and pepper. Keep stirring a lot.
5. Throw it all together: When the pasta is done and the cheese sauce is done, throw everything together and stir until combined.
6. EAT!